RMR Fall Round 6: Dec. 1 Dartschleife

[Fozzy Bear]

We inturpt our regularly schedualed David vs Goliath for this weeks DOZER VS TOM 2.0 THE TRANSFORMER followed by Full House then the Cosby show at 8.

[Giddyup]

While Fozzy weaves a tale of joy and tragedy...today’s big board

[Fozzy Bear]

Welcome Sunday race fans to RMR's shortest course in the line up. What it lacks in feet it more than makes up in sheer terror. With a track that seems to flow with gravity nothing is as it seems. This course has no flat sections and gently guides your car into its progressive turns slamming you into the walls. Your tires will feel slipperyer than snot on door knob (Al-ism) yet your feet will be well planted on the ground. Make one mistake and your opponents will pass you by not just seconds but multiple laps. Even the name Dartschleife pronounced in English as Dart-in-slo-fall-derk-in-hiem-er-doodle-bug-in-snuffle-up-a-gis-in-loafle-house-in-burg means "Soul Less One" We wish you luck young racers for if you are not full of fear "you will be" "you will be........"

[Fozzy Bear]

Round 1 Trans-American. We have hi def photos right from the side of the race track. We see David and Tom neck and neck here

Al and Tom 2.0 in a tight corner here#

3rd heats starting line-up was wild with excitement

Well thats a little different than our regularly scheduled car pile up that we call racing. For a top heavy car on a difficult track that was smoother than a fresh jar of skippy. This round is brought to you by our sponser Skippy peanut butter. You want our nuts in your mouth. Skippy peanut butter.

It looks like Trans-Am's snooze feast turned into who could out last the others. With a Cool smooth driver David took a commanding lead taking 1st in all 3 laps. Close on his heals and asleep at the wheel was our last minute surprise entry and current overall 1st place TTT coming in a respectable 2nd. Just couldn't let it go hmmmmmm. Transformer showing everyone whos boss slipped into 3rd with No Hands close behind. Al was no where to be seen.

[Fozzy Bear]

After the Air Horn that signaled the end of round 1 woke everyone up the DTM's rolled out. With too much power, and a big rear end these cars have been a lot of things...... a snooze fest has never been one of them. They did not disappoint. As Al tried to get every 1/32 of a inch he could, he layed down lap after lap of consistency trying desperately to fend off the Transformer. But with the Transformers close proximity to the track he might as well have home track advantage. After a long nap he woke up drank 1 coke and 2 red bulls then hopped into a car that looked an aweful lot like my car. Wait did he steal my sponser. No Hands drove his car like it was stolen smashing guard rails till the screws came out. This man was on a mission and with Badger Bob missing in action after he got sunny side up mixed up with over easy No Hands has a real shot at Bronze for the end of the Year. He is currently the top of the Vegas Odds chart. If it happens he will rob Aaron of the trophy and honestly who's going to stop him you can't even see the mans hands. David rolled up to the starting block blaring Vanilla Ice sporting a bran new haircut. He was quoted as saying "Anything less than the best is a felony" I don't think i've ever seen this side of David. He was burning up tires like taco's on tuesday. Tom needs to take his car to the clinic cause its about to get burnt. But just like No Hands he did have a habit of over-cooking the big sweeping corner right after the strait and smashing hard. Lucky for Vanilla David marshals where definatly on point today especially after there little Trans-Am nap. Speaking of i would like to nominate myself as Marshal of the year. I may not be the fastest or the most deserving or the most consistent but if there is a marshal of the year stash you bet i could rock it the best. After the new and improved David started laying down some serious beats and some serious laps this bear caught TTT sneaking a peak under Davids ICE car. Doing a little tech spec are we. Did i see fear in his eyes. Is his reign of terror coming to a close. Only time will tell. In-between David and Tom was our newest racer and rookie of the year Krista. From the looks of things she is also going for gentlemanly racer of the year doing her best not to get into the way of David Vs Goliath. In the end TTT took 1st barely stealing it from David who came in 2nd just 1.9 laps behind. In 3rd was the Transformer himself Tom2.0 and Al close behind.

[Fozzy Bear]

As TSN and sometimes P class rolled up, one thing was very clear change was in the air. Our Rookie of the year pulled off her very first "not last" in a series of maneuvers that sent this bears eyes a spinning. This is where giants are made as the first steps into the slot car addiction begin. No where left to go but strait up as her lap counts grew considerably. Next year will be interesting indeed. TTT showed up with a red Policar in yellow a white 908 in red and a green 917 in green. This guy can color coordinate like Stevie Wonder on a shopping spree. But he's testing for next year for sure. T2 had a black Mclearn that seems to coasts even after the power shuts off. Skippy peanut butter i'm telling ya. Al's silver 917 has been renamed to the "Aluminum Falcon" seemed fast and loose as he over spun. Even T2 managed to turn his Mclearn into spin-derella as the competition heated up. As the two rivals sped down the raceway neck and neck the rest of the RMR crew broke out in song "why can't we be friends, why can't we be friends" It was quickly pointed out NO FRIENDS in racing. TTT with his quick car changes still took 1st with David hot on his heals again just 3.5 laps behind. T2 took 3rd Nohands 4th and AL 5th.

[Fozzy Bear]

I would like to take this opportunity to thank David for hosting. Your course is amazing and the cookies where out of this world. With Davids massive effort huge skill and overall incredible skill TTT still beat him out by a mere 2.2 laps landing TTT in 1st and Dave in 2nd. Tom 2.0 took a beautiful 3rd. Al in 4th and No Hands in 5th. Thank you all for coming out to race on this frosty cold December day please remember to drive safe and keep your stick on the ice

[Giddyup]

Fozzy, you’ve missed your calling...Deep Thoughts by a Muppet may indeed be the name of your memoirs!

Some close racing and very clean...even the marshals needed a few extra shots of Vizene to keep up with the pace of the cars. As we only had the magnificent seven show, no one could man the cameras to capture some of then scintillating maneuvers. Watching Penelope Pitstop wear the “slot pants” was indeed a sight to be seen as she showed Fozzy what married life will look like!

David our gracious host, and not to mention speedy, always the benchmark to measure one self against. Well done to Thomas for nabbing a well earned Podium! The mid pack was where it was at today...some epic driving, from No Hands’ yellow GT40 to the Matt’s banana-plantation sponsored 917 to T2’s Black Cars Matter campaign to Al’isms....which were abundant and graphic in nature.

My highlight was watching R2T2 battle the Dozer ...friends? Or more than friends? What do they say, maybe a picture can sum it up in less than a 1000 words...we all left feeling a little warmer on this chilly day...even the Ice Man!

[Shadow]

Thanks for coming to race today.
Congratulations to Thomas for being on all of the class podiums today.
Also, thank you, Goldilocks, for chasing that ornery bear out of the house.