RMR Fall Round 7 : Aldorado Dec 15 2019

[Fozzy Bear]

Well alot has happen on this cold December Sunday although its slightly fuzzy after being run over by a Red Group C Momo car that i didn't get the licence plate of so BEAR with me.

[Fozzy Bear]

Well our general meeting was held before the race. A few new rules have been introduced. After a lengthy copyright lawsuit The Shadow aka "David" in David vs Goliath can no longer be associated with Vanilla Ice. Even though the similarities are staggering this Bear is sad to announce we must now call him "Shadow" formily David formily The David formily Shadow formily White Shadow and last formily David. Our new secret handshake is now "bump cough shake it to the left forward slap backward slap and a saying phishhhhhhh at the end. Alot of changes may be happening in the new year as yet to be determined. One thing is for sure Pants are now an official rule. No pants no racing, you know who you are.

Trucks where a mess to the point where i think we just voted them off the RMR island. Don't totally quote me on this alot happened in a little time. I belive the consensis was we tried it and just like Syphilis lets cure the problem and move on. However they did run rather well on Al's track. This Bear does hope to see them in a host class at a later time if for no other reason than to chear on the carnage. Tom was 1st David 2nd and No Hands in 3rd.

Everyones Favorite Group C was up next. This was fast and loose. Kevins Silk Cut chopped up the compition. Al was busted trying to sneak an NSR into a slot it class. It was an honest mistake that left me wondering what would have happened if we had let him race it. He was fined $10,000 and had to buy Wendy's Cheeseburgers for all the kids in the stands. Also as a secondary punishment he now has to use the No Hands driving style for the next 3 races. The real No Hands was so outraged we actually saw his hands. Another lawsuit has been filed against RMR quoting "You Cutting My Grass Bro" Tom landed in 1st David in 2nd and No Hands in 3rd. Considering this is a heavy weighted track due its high speeds i have a good feeling about this.

Last Group 5 and i think we all know why they are called Racer Sideways. These tire melting over powered monsters are perfictly suited for Aldorado. Each one tearing up the lanes in a attempt to keep the shiney side up and the Kevin side down. In the end Tom 1st David 2nd and No Hands 3rd.

Now i'm not a Mathmatishion but i do play a Rocket Surgion in a book i just made up. I think for the Fall line up Kenny "No Hands" just took Bronze. I don't have the stats as they will be later but if he is our Bronze overall winner he definatly deserves it. He is one of the most consistanly dangerious drivers to be near. He never flys out he never gives up and he never loses. He has no weak class or a weak track. For someoen with no weaknesses that means everything is a strenght. I wish you luck or great No Handed one.

Thank you all for an amazing season and i can't wait for the winder Enduros

[Giddyup]

I want first dibs on your new book Fozzy, something tells me it’s a cross between a SCI-FI/adventure/fantasy crosses with a RomCom! Thanks to Alan for allowing us all to play. Aldorado is definitely the fastest track, even when theTrucks are still part of the mix. Speaking of Syphillis, I think Kevin’s truck tried a few times commit sloticide diving off the overpass. Although that wasn’t nearly as impressive as Fozzy’s 180 to stay in the slot in a bid to back it up and recross the finish line to set fast “lap.”

Some closing thoughts on the new Fall season format. I really enjoyed the distance aspect as you could see just how close some races were with maybe a1 deslot being the only factor. A big shout out and high five to tha man No Hands, for forming securing his first drivers championship Podium ...long overdue, but not the least bit surprising!

Onto the Winter season, a strictly enduro format. We’ll be trialing the European lane rotation format to ensure their is rest built in for the drivers. And with just one class and a constant mix of teammates...the results be as about as easy to predict as the next tweet from a certain US president.

[Fozzy Bear]

Is that president Osama i mean Obama oh crap i've said too much.............

[No Hands]

Although I'd like to claim third in the truck race, that win actually goes to AL uminum. As of this write up, the official results have not been posted so I can't officially claim to have won third place "Hands Down" but thanks all for the congratulations - it has been a long time coming. Now for my next trick.... winning a race using the Jedi force. The force may not be strong in this one....